Q: Is it bad to cuddle my dog a lot? I’ve heard too much affection can cause separation anxiety.

A: No, cuddling your dog doesn’t cause separation anxiety. That’s a myth that’s thankfully fading. Affection strengthens the human–dog bond and gives your dog a secure emotional base, which is actually protective, not problematic.

Separation anxiety happens when a dog has no coping strategy for being alone, often because they were never taught that alone time is safe and predictable. It’s not about how much you cuddle, but how you prepare them for separation.

If your dog struggles when you leave, start with short absences, pair your departures with positive associations (like food puzzles), and avoid dramatic exits or reunions. If the anxiety is intense, you may need help from a behaviourist. But please don’t feel guilty for showing love; security and affection are vital to emotional resilience.

Affection isn’t one-size-fits-all

Cuddling can be wonderful but only if your dog enjoys it. Some dogs love being draped across your lap. Others prefer affection at arm’s length, or only on their terms.

To check if your dog is genuinely comfortable with cuddling, try the ‘consent test’

Consent test:

• Gently stroke your dog for a few seconds, then stop.
• If they nudge you, lean in, or reposition themselves for more – great!
• If they move away, shake off, or avoid eye contact, they may not have been enjoying it.

Watch for these signs of discomfort:

• Licking lips or yawning during the cuddle
• Stiff body or turning head away
• Whale eye (showing the whites of the eyes)
• Moving away or avoiding the interaction entirely

Every dog is different. Some want full-on snuggles. Others prefer gentle head scratches or sitting beside you without touch.

Let your dog choose how connection looks for them.